Money Why you should lie on your resume.

Aphex

Hi.
Aug 12, 2022
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You should always tell lies on your CV in the current workplace. Whether you completely conceal anything or simply inflate your abilities.

Many bosses make absurd demands and make unjust decisions about employees (job gaps, not being outgoing enough). For things you can figure out in ten minutes, they need five or more years of experience (sales, retail, customer service). You can acquire all the experience you want by lying. Your backstory must be coherent, plausible, and not too outrageous for your abilities to be limited by these factors. It also aids in avoiding work gaps.

"What if they find out?"🤓
Most lower-paying jobs don't even check so long as you tell them you have experience.

Prior to even starting to apply for jobs, always map out your background, experiences, and personality. If necessary, practice, and maintain your composure. Second, you should be prepared with proof in case the firm asks for it. Thus, this is what you do. Have a friend or someone you paid to pose as your prior boss. Indicate their phone number on your resume.

Thirdly, there are no repercussions, not even the manager or recruiter berating you for a while, even if they do catch you. It's not against the law, and even if they post a lengthy argument against you on LinkedIn (which they won't), nobody will see it and dissuade you from applying. The majority of businesses won't even know where to look, therefore it will simply be lost to time.

"I can't lie. Lying is bad/evil/immoral!"🤓
You shouldn't lie to close friends or someone you're in a good relationship with. Why? Because you both care about and trust each other.

But in the workplace, this caring and trust are gone. Your boss sees you as a cog in a machine that needs to be mined for cash. They despise the fact that you have feelings because they prevent them from producing money, and they'll do everything in their power to replace you with a robot as soon as possible. Some businesses use child labor that has been outsourced and overwork their staff while paying them next to nothing.
 
HR are fucking scumbags and job searching makes you lose self respect with how recruiters treat you.

Job gap bias is an example of how stupid and inefficient HR is.
 
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I've never ever heard of anyone checking someone's credentials. You either get a follow up interview/offer back or get ghosted/generic rejection email. JFL at thinking they will open and FBI tier investigation into you to check if you have the degree you say you do.

Literally just lie, especially about work experience. That's how I got my first job.
 

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