Geomax Pre-China Jitters

Rance

Rance

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U.S. → Japan → China
7 weeks from now I hop on an airplane to Japan. Stay there for a little over a week then fly to China. 2 weeks of fucking around and then my job starts.

Today or yesterday I started getting the feeling that I got before I left for Japan the first time. A huge surge of optimism, tension, hope, and excitement. It is literally and unironically similar to the feeling of being on a cocaine high. I love every second of it.

To make matters more extreme I've begun using Tandem to talk with Chinese girls. Not using HelloTalk yet because (as per my guide) I don't want to jump the gun and have to carry conversations for too long. Tandem is "less valuable" to me so I figured why not. When I tell you I get a dopamine hit every time a notification comes through would be an understatement. As I'm typing this my phone buzzed and I see a "omg heyyy" from some girl with a name I can't fucking read.

This is a message to all you aspiring geomaxxers: the good feelings don't start when you arrive to the country, they start well before you arrive! Look forward to it!
 
Ok Tandem is pretty damn okay, I recommend you all get started with it. Lots of Chinese users but the catch is that about half of them are located in the U.S. Huge reverse geomaxxing potential here
 
Rance said:
Fucking Tandem user got all horny with me and I thought I was in and they add me on IG and it's a dude!! FML
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I was on Tandem to learn Chinese a few months ago and I have a feeling I know who you're talking about. My tranny radar didn't set off the alarms at first because it was that convincing but something was definitely off. If you have high testosterone then I can see how you were duped.

Another thing I like about the app is that it gives access to Taiwan unlike Hellotalk
 
Rance said:
22k after tax and I get free accommodations, fairly close to the center of the city. I'm pretty happy with it, only downside is the provided apartment is a bit tight and I have to live in a building with all the other teachers
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You got that contract with just a tefl cert and degree ? How many places did u apply brah i couldn't get an offer clearing 20k
 
shine said:
You got that contract with just a tefl cert and degree ? How many places did u apply brah i couldn't get an offer clearing 20k
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I applied to a lot of places, but virtually all of my interviews were provided directly by recruiting agents. They'd find my profile on eChinacities, email me with their WeChat information, and get me set up with tons of interviews. My offer rate from interviews was maybe 33%, so I got about 10 offers in total.

20k is more than enough in most cities but yeah you might want to try to push it up another 1k or 2k

As for why I had so much success I don't know. I framed my work history to appear as international relations/teaching related which isn't a huge stretch, but a stretch nonetheless. I also have a master's degree in an unrelated subject which may provide some kind of halo in the sense of "he's serious about academics". Finally, I have a stereotypical "investment banker" phenotype which might help
 
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Rance said:
7 weeks from now I hop on an airplane to Japan. Stay there for a little over a week then fly to China. 2 weeks of fucking around and then my job starts.

Today or yesterday I started getting the feeling that I got before I left for Japan the first time. A huge surge of optimism, tension, hope, and excitement. It is literally and unironically similar to the feeling of being on a cocaine high. I love every second of it.

To make matters more extreme I've begun using Tandem to talk with Chinese girls. Not using HelloTalk yet because (as per my guide) I don't want to jump the gun and have to carry conversations for too long. Tandem is "less valuable" to me so I figured why not. When I tell you I get a dopamine hit every time a notification comes through would be an understatement. As I'm typing this my phone buzzed and I see a "omg heyyy" from some girl with a name I can't fucking read.

This is a message to all you aspiring geomaxxers: the good feelings don't start when you arrive to the country, they start well before you arrive! Look forward to it!
Click to expand...
you are totally normal, enjoy it. Its' what you wanted right?

But you are right, girls now a days have attention spans less than of a gold fish. Best to keep it short, and to the point. Remember, all girls are always sizing you up, you say too much or the wrong thing, and your in the "dont' want to fuck him" group.

talk too much and you are in the friendzone.
talk too much and you seem desperate.

fuck her first. Then you own her, THEN be chatty
 
rance how many girls do you juggle at a time in tandem/hellotalk? do you mostly text? how many days of texting and how consistently before you set up a meetup?

I have found texting is harder to maintain. you need to keep them engaged a lot more, for less emotional connection/payoff, because she is already texting with dozens of guys. its a time suck. a direct call makes a stronger impression and it gives (some) women the type of attention they're craving

I am juggling about 8 girls at the moment, mostly just through calling every now and then. its still a time suck but I have about 6 women guaranteed for this month from hellotalk out of about 20 I called or so.

I am trying to figure out if I should be calling less and texting more to spare the time. but texting doesn't go very far for me unless its on tinder. it's probably my approach. I could probably escalate almost immediately to romance on hellotalk through text, it just seems harder than in tinder to take the direct approach. escalating through call seems better. but christ it takes some time.
 
BiggChungus said:
rance how many girls do you juggle at a time in tandem/hellotalk? do you mostly text?

I have found texting is harder to maintain. you need to keep them engaged a lot more, for less emotional connection/payoff, because she is already texting with dozens of guys. its a time suck. a direct call makes a stronger impression and it gives (some) women the type of attention they're craving

I am juggling about 8 girls at the moment, mostly just through calling every now and then. its still a time suck but I have about 6 women guaranteed for this month from hellotalk out of about 20 I called or so.

I am trying to figure out if I should be calling less and texting more to spare the time. but texting doesn't go very far for me unless its on tinder. it's probably my approach. I could probably escalate almost immediately to romance on hellotalk through text, it just seems harder than in tinder to take the direct approach. escalating through call seems better. but christ it takes some time.
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For texting I juggle an uncapped number of girls. I just constantly reply to anyone cute who engages with me. Girls will naturally be left behind, getting lost in the sea of messages, if I'm getting a lot of attention from girls who are more engaging. It's never an intentional decision to cut off contact or anything like that.

I agree that calling is very powerful and needs to be utilized to stand out from the crowd and make a personal connection. But to me, calling is a "bridge" between texting and meeting. The "calling phase" (that is, we're calling but haven't met yet) will typically last about a week at most. If we can't meet by that point we're just online buddies, which is fine over text, but horribly inefficient if calling is in the mix because, as you say, calling takes a lot of time and energy.

On your first or second call you should be steering the conversation into a meetup. I like to "plant the seed" on the first call by asking questions like "have you been to X part of the city?", "do you like cafes?/bars?/etc.?", "you should check out X place sometime, maybe I could show you around". Then, on the second call, you can formally ask her to go with you, and it won't be abrupt.
 
Rance said:
For texting I juggle an uncapped number of girls. I just constantly reply to anyone cute who engages with me. Girls will naturally be left behind, getting lost in the sea of messages, if I'm getting a lot of attention from girls who are more engaging. It's never an intentional decision to cut off contact or anything like that.

I agree that calling is very powerful and needs to be utilized to stand out from the crowd and make a personal connection. But to me, calling is a "bridge" between texting and meeting. The "calling phase" (that is, we're calling but haven't met yet) will typically last about a week at most. If we can't meet by that point we're just online buddies, which is fine over text, but horribly inefficient if calling is in the mix because, as you say, calling takes a lot of time and energy.

On your first or second call you should be steering the conversation into a meetup. I like to "plant the seed" on the first call by asking questions like "have you been to X part of the city?", "do you like cafes?/bars?/etc.?", "you should check out X place sometime, maybe I could show you around". Then, on the second call, you can formally ask her to go with you, and it won't be abrupt.
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great approach. how do you budget your time. just text who is engaging and live with whoever falls out is a good approach. but how much time do you spend texting daily, would you estimate
 
BiggChungus said:
great approach. how do you budget your time. just text who is engaging and live with whoever falls out is a good approach. but how much time do you spend texting daily, would you estimate
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You get these situations where the girl stops replying. Or more often, she'll reply with 1 word or a basic phrase that doesn't offer any contribution. It feels like hitting a brick wall, and in these moments you have to forcibly restart the conversation. I call these defibrillator moments. Depending on my message volume at the given time I will sometimes hit the defibrillator or I will sometimes ignore and let the chat fade into history. More than 2-3 defibrillator moments in a short timeframe means there's something wrong with the girl.

Time spent on HT: never thought about it. I just did it on the train back and forth from school/work, when I was cooking dinner, or whenever I had a moment. I'd say something like 20-30 minutes a day but doing it during the down times makes it feel like nothing.
 
Rance said:
You get these situations where the girl stops replying. Or more often, she'll reply with 1 word or a basic phrase that doesn't offer any contribution. It feels like hitting a brick wall, and in these moments you have to forcibly restart the conversation. I call these defibrillator moments. Depending on my message volume at the given time I will sometimes hit the defibrillator or I will sometimes ignore and let the chat fade into history. More than 2-3 defibrillator moments in a short timeframe means there's something wrong with the girl.

Time spent on HT: never thought about it. I just did it on the train back and forth from school/work, when I was cooking dinner, or whenever I had a moment. I'd say something like 20-30 minutes a day but doing it during the down times makes it feel like nothing.
Click to expand...
Good point and I know exactly what you mean by defibrillator moments which is when I start getting more personal with them. I've found that a lot of the times if you're able to break through these then the bond is pretty strong from then on. At the bare minimum she'll at least become a friend but usually this is when they'll start opening up more and developing heavier feelings in my experience.

Recently I've started to cut down on conversations because I can't keep up anymore. I'd rather spend time on the ones where there's heavy mutual interest.
 
geneblackman said:
Good point and I know exactly what you mean by defibrillator moments which is when I start getting more personal with them. I've found that a lot of the times if you're able to break through these then the bond is pretty strong from then on. At the bare minimum she'll at least become a friend but usually this is when they'll start opening up more and developing heavier feelings in my experience.
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Yeah yeah I've always called this "cutting deep", asking what she thinks about something personal or emotional. Brings you closer together. I'll have to add that to my defibrillation first aid kit.

geneblackman said:
Recently I've started to cut down on conversations because I can't keep up anymore. I'd rather spend time on the ones where there's heavy mutual interest.
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Problem I have is I get really excited in the beginning and message a ton of people, then the replies catch up with me and I realize I reached out to too many people.

Same issue with studying language in SRS sytems btw... doing too many lessons and then there's a tsunami of reviews
 
BiggChungus said:
rance how many girls do you juggle at a time in tandem/hellotalk? do you mostly text? how many days of texting and how consistently before you set up a meetup?

I have found texting is harder to maintain. you need to keep them engaged a lot more, for less emotional connection/payoff, because she is already texting with dozens of guys. its a time suck. a direct call makes a stronger impression and it gives (some) women the type of attention they're craving

I am juggling about 8 girls at the moment, mostly just through calling every now and then. its still a time suck but I have about 6 women guaranteed for this month from hellotalk out of about 20 I called or so.

I am trying to figure out if I should be calling less and texting more to spare the time. but texting doesn't go very far for me unless its on tinder. it's probably my approach. I could probably escalate almost immediately to romance on hellotalk through text, it just seems harder than in tinder to take the direct approach. escalating through call seems better. but christ it takes some time.
Click to expand...
Care to share what city and/or country this is in?
Also, what kind of girls are you getting in terms of looks levels and ages as an older white HTN?
You’re probably like late 30’s or early 40’s, right?
 
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